New Year’s Resolutions Blog

A couple of months ago a friend sent me an article from Sports Illustrated written by Rick Reilly. I hope you gain some inspiration from it. Following the article is a link to a video, but please do read this story first - then go look at the video. You might want to grab some tissues.

I try to be a good father. Give my kids mulligans. Work nights to pay for their text messaging. Take them to swimsuit shoots.

But compared with Dick Hoyt, I suck.

Eighty-five times he’s pushed his disabled son, Rick, 26.2 miles in Marathons. Eight times he’s not only pushed him 26.2 miles in a Wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dinghy while swimming and pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars–all in the same day. Dick’s also pulled him cross-country skiing, taken him on his back Mountain climbing and once hauled him across the U.S. On a bike. Makes taking your son bowling look a little lame, right?

And what has Rick done for his father? Not much–except save his life.
This love story began in Winchester , Mass. , 43 years ago, when Rick Was strangled by the umbilical cord during birth, leaving him brain-damaged and unable to control his limbs.

“He’ll be a vegetable the rest of his life;'’ Dick says doctors told him and his wife, Judy, when Rick was nine months old. “Put him in an Institution.'’

But the Hoyts weren’t buying it. They noticed the way Rick’s eyes followed them around the room. When Rick was 11 they took him to the Engineering Department at Tufts University and asked if there was anything to help the boy communicate. “No way,'’ Dick says he was told. “There’s nothing going on in his brain.'’

“Tell him a joke,'’ Dick countered. They did. Rick laughed. Turns out a lot was going on in his brain. Rigged up with a computer that allowed him to control the cursor by touching a switch with the side of his head, Rick was finally able to communicate. First words? “Go Bruins!'’ And after a high school classmate was paralyzed in an accident and the school organized a charity run for him, Rick pecked out, “Dad, I want to do that.'’
Yeah, right. How was Dick, a self-described “porker'’ who never ran more than a mile at a time, going to push his son five miles? Still, he tried. “Then it was me who was handicapped,'’ Dick says. “I was sore for two weeks.'’

That day changed Rick’s life. “Dad,'’ he typed, “when we were running, it felt like I wasn’t disabled anymore!'’

And that sentence changed Dick’s life. He became obsessed with giving Rick that feeling as often as he could. He got into such hard-belly shape that he and Rick were ready to try the 1979 Boston Marathon.

“No way,'’ Dick was told by a race official. The Hoyts weren’t quite a single runner, and they weren’t quite a wheelchair competitor. For a few Years Dick and Rick just joined the massive field and ran anyway, then they found a way to get into the race officially: In 1983 they ran another marathon so fast they made the Qualifying time for Boston the following year.

Then somebody said, “Hey, Dick, why not a triathlon?'’

How’s a guy who never learned to swim and hadn’t ridden a bike since he was six going to haul his 110-pound kid through a triathlon? Still, Dick tried.

Now they’ve done 212 triathlons, including four grueling 15-hour Ironmans in Hawaii . It must be a buzzkill to be a 25-year-old stud getting passed by an old guy towing a grown man in a dinghy, don’t you think?

Hey, Dick, why not see how you’d do on your own? “No way,'’ he says. Dick does it purely for “the awesome feeling'’ he gets seeing Rick with a cantaloupe smile as they run, swim and ride together.

This year, at ages 65 and 43, Dick and Rick finished their 24th Boston Marathon, in 5,083rd place out of more than 20,000 starters. Their best time? Two hours, 40 minutes in 1992–only 35 minutes off the world Record, which, in case you don’t keep track of these things, happens to be held by a guy who was not pushing another man in a wheelchair at the time.

“No question about it,'’ Rick types. “My dad is the Father of the Century.'’

And Dick got something else out of all this too. Two years ago he had a mild heart attack during a race. Doctors found that one of his arteries was 95% clogged. “If you hadn’t been in such great shape,'’ one doctor told him, “you probably would’ve died 15 years ago.'’ So, in a way, Dick and Rick saved each other’s life.
Rick, who has his own apartment (he gets home care) and works in Boston, and Dick, retired from the military and living in Holland, Mass. , always find ways to be together. They give speeches around the country and compete in some backbreaking race every weekend, including this Father’s Day.

That night, Rick will buy his dad dinner, but the thing he really wants to give him is a gift he can never buy.

“The thing I’d most like,'’ Rick types, “is that my dad sit in the chair and I push him once.'’

Watch the moving video.

Well, it has been 4 days now and I’m sticking with it so far. I have to admit I am sleeping a lot. It’s an easy way to avoid the longing for a cigarette and has gotten me through some rough spots. I’m an early riser, so it is not hard for me to take a nap in the afternoon.

I’m finding my hardest time to be the mornings. I used to light up even before the coffee was done brewing! That really is the main time I can call it a struggle. I haven’t been smoking in the evenings for a few weeks now, so I hardly notice it at night now - even after dinner.

Oh yeah, I am eating more often too. That is something I’m going to have to work on. I don’t want to replace one bad habit with another, but I’m not over-worrying about it yet. I need to address one thing at a time.

I can’t tell you how much it means to me to read the messages of encouragement here and I again thank Antman over at cre8Buzz for his support and that of his readers.

I would love to hear from others who are facing this same struggle and would like to share their stories here.

So, things are moving along - now if I can just keep the crises out of my life for a while untl I am stronger - that should do it!

I have set a general goal to run my marathon in less than five hours. A little closer to four and a half (Oprah’s time was 4:29, and I feel like I should be able to beat her, but I don’t want to get in over my head!) would be great, but I want to set a fairly conservative goal so I’m not too disappointed. It’s my first marathon, after all, and hopefully there will be more if all goes well! I have the rest of my life to run a sub-four marathon –  but I’ll need a little more training before that happens! Continue reading

I’m a big proponent of breaking down tasks into smaller increments. You want to write a novel? Don’t think about writing 50,000 words (like the NaNoWriMo people do); think about outlining your plot, sketching your characters, then writing 1000 (or 500, or 300, or as many as you can manage) words each day. Half of those words may never become part of your final novel–but you’ll never create a novel without them.
Continue reading

I’m a big fan of my iPod, but I don’t actually use the iTunes Store that much. This article, though, points out that the iTunes Store has a benefit I’d never thought about before: an environmental one!
Continue reading

I just came across some celebrity resolutions I wanted to share with you. These are real goals - the commentary is mine!

 

Hugh Grant:

‘It has to be to get fit - get back into shape - because I looked in the mirror recently and I noticed that I’ve developed love handles!’

Rachel Weisz:

My New Year’s resolution is to learn to cook - seriously - because I can’t cook anything. It’s really bothering me because I love food and love eating. Being able to cook would be fantastic’ That’s what I keep telling my daughter in law!

 Drew Barrymore:

‘I gotta stop biting my nails’ Every little bit of self improvement helps!

Pamela Anderson:

‘Mine is to read all my own contracts and sign all my own cheques. I used to trust everyone but not any more. Maybe it was because I’m Canadian!’ HUH? She should probably learn to read first.

Neve Campbell:

‘My New Year’s resolution is to quit smoking! We’ll see. But I’m gonna try, I’m gonna try…’  Me too, Neve, me too!

Colin Farrell:

‘To fall in love and find a good woman to spend time with. But I don’t know how good I would be at making the relationship work. I’ve been working a lot the last few years and that also makes it more difficult’  It also deprives the rest of us women!

Mischa Barton:

‘To watch what I say. I always end up saying something stupid that comes back at me later’  Been there, done that - open mouth, insert foot!

Kate Beckinsale:

‘My New Year’s resolution would be to write more. I certainly want to do more writing. I like the creativity of writing, it is a great outlet and I want to do more of it’ *Giggle*, well first you might want to stop saying write or writing and secondly, don’t repeat in your last sentence what you said in your first sentence!  Yeah, I know that is a little mean - you will have to give me a little slack, I am in nicotine withdrawal and a little cranky.

Renée Zellweger:

‘I’m clumsy, self-deprecating, uncertain at times, and I say stupid things. So if I can stop being one of these things in 2007 I’ll be happy’ You are such a sweetheart, don’t change a thing!

Catherine Zeta Jones:

‘I’d love to take some time away from movies and do something on stage. I’d love to do a show in Vegas with drag queens. The tackier the better’  Now, that’s what I call a goal!

Angelina Jolie:

‘I want to spend as much time as possible with my family’ She may want to try staying home for a bit so they know where home IS!  Sorry, it’s the nicotine thing again.

Sienna Miller:

‘To quit smoking. I should quit and I am trying’ Join Neve and me!

Jude Law ‘To get my pilot’s license. I’ve had a few lessons but I never seem to get round to doing any more’  Come see me, I can give you some lessons!

Cameron Diaz:

‘Not to worry so much. I’m a great worrier. Even now, I still can’t help worrying about paying the rent’ Just buy the house outright, that should end one worry.

Charlotte Church:

‘I say this every year, but I am going to try to eat more healthily and abide by it. I eat too many sweets and pizza and other junk food. I also eat lots of healthy stuff, but I eat too much crap along with it’  I am hearing that, Charlotte!

Paris Hilton:

‘I’d love to find the right guy and get married. I want to have kids in the next two or three years. I can’t wait to have a little daughter and dress her up just like me’  Talk about child abuse - somebody pass the barf bag please!

Kate Winslet:

‘Eat less things I shouldn’t, not to smoke too much, work out when I have to rather then when I want to.’

And finally,

Sandra Bullock:

‘Get fat! No, I don’t make resolutions because I never, ever live up to them’  It’s clear that Sandra has not heard about our blog!  Hang in there fellow resolutionists!

People who have never belonged to an online community find it hard to believe that you can think of someone you have never met as a good friend of yours. They don’t realize that you can sometimes talk with them more frequently than you do with your own family.

My relationship with Fred is like that. Fred came to us from Amsterdam, so that is why I never met her face to face. I have all kinds of gifts from Amsterdam, because Fred is just like that. She loves to send little presents, she never forgets a birthday or other special occasion in our lives. Her sense of humor is intelligent, quick and seemingly never ending. She’s the kind of person that you want to be around. She is one of the kindest, most generous, most loving people I have ever “met”.

It was hard to get one up on Fred! If you sent something to her, she’d send something right back to you! And even when you didn’t send something, she still would have something in the mail for me! Yep, it was hard to outdo her.

Like me, Fred is a smoker. Like me, she found it really tough to quit, both of us having smoked for many years. Fred never complained about anything, she seemed to take life as it came at her. This time, life was coming at her in a battle for her life. She was diagnosed about a year ago with emphysema. Pretty soon, she was too weak to come visit our community. We all missed her frequent posts and her unfailing humor but we tried to stay in contact with her, even if she could not reply. We wanted her to know we missed her and had not forgotten about her.

I was extremely sad to receive an email yesterday from her son, who told me that Fred had lost this final battle. It came one day after I had smoked my last cigarette. I pray that stopping now has not come too late for me, as it did for Fred.

Fred’s life had great meaning. I want to be sure her death has great meaning too. Losing her has strengthened my resolve to stick with this. I know it is what she would have wanted for me. I dedicate my struggle to her. I love you, Fred.

I live in Maine where you don’t just walk down to the corner store if you need something. As I’ve mentioned previously, I work from home. The price of gas, being what it is, has caused us to make as few trips to the store as possible.  You are probably wondering why I’m telling you this.  Since my husband works in town, he usually picks up cigarettes for me. Continue reading

Yesterday I came across this cool new site called Only Human. It’s a place for people to share mistakes they’ve made in the past to help ensure that others won’t make the same ones. It’s still pretty new, but they’ve gotten a surprising amount of contributions in a short time. Continue reading

I just came across some really practical help from The American Cancer Society that I’d like to share with our readers who are trying to quit smoking. I found it really helpful because it offers smokers some concrete suggestions and not just generalizations about how to handle withdrawal.

 

So, if you are also trying to quit, I hope you find something useful to help get over those cravings and tough situations.

Things to Do to Get Through Rough Spots After You Stop Smoking

 

For the first few days after you quit smoking, spend as much free time as possible in public places where smoking is not allowed, such as libraries, malls, museums, theaters, restaurants without bars, and churches. 

Don’t drink alcohol, coffee, and other drinks you associate with smoking. Try drinking a variety of other drinks instead. Try different types of waters or fruit juices. This may be the time to indulge in some interesting teas you have never tried. 

If you miss the feeling of having a cigarette in your hand, put a substitute in your hand — a pencil, a paper clip, a coin, or a marble, for example. 

If you miss the feeling of having something in your mouth, try toothpicks, cinnamon sticks, sugarless gum or celery. 

Avoid temptation by staying away from situations you associate with pleasurable smoking. 

Find new habits and create a nonsmoking environment around you. 

Anticipate future situations or crises that might make you want to smoke again, and remind yourself of all the important reasons you have decided to quit. To reinforce these reasons, you may want to put a picture of your children up in your workplace or keep one handy in your purse or wallet. 

Take deep, rhythmic breaths similar to smoking to relax, and picture your lungs filling with fresh, clean air. 

Remember your goal and the fact that the urges to smoke will eventually pass. 

Think positive thoughts about how awesome it is that you are quitting smoking and getting healthy and try to avoid negative ones. 

Brush your teeth and enjoy that fresh taste. 

Do brief bursts of exercise (alternate tensing and relaxing muscles, pushups, deep knee bends, walk up a flight of stairs, or touch your toes). 

Call a supportive friend, family member, or Quitline^® counselor. 

Eat several small meals during the day instead of 1 or 2 large ones. This maintains constant blood sugar levels, which keeps your energy in balance and helps prevent the urge to smoke. Avoid sugary or spicy foods that may trigger a desire for cigarettes. 

Above all, reward yourself. Reward yourself frequently if that’s what it takes to keep going. Plan to do something fun for doing your best.

 

When You Get the “Crazies”

• Keep oral substitutes handy, such as carrots, pickles, apples, celery, raisins, or gum. 
• Take 10 deep breaths, and hold the last one while lighting a match. Exhale slowly and blow out the match. Pretend it is a cigarette and put it out in an ashtray. 
• Take a shower or bath. 
• Learn to relax quickly and deeply. Make yourself go limp. Visualize a soothing, pleasing situation, and get away from it all for a moment. Concentrate on that peaceful image and nothing else. 
• Light incense or a candle, instead of a cigarette. 
• Tell yourself “no.” Say it out loud. Practice doing this a few times, and listen to yourself. Some other things you can say to yourself might be, “I’m too strong to give in to smoking,” “I’m a nonsmoker now,” or “I don’t want to let my friends and family down.” 
• Never allow yourself to think that “one won’t hurt,” because it may. 
• Wear a rubber band around your wrist. Whenever you have a thought about smoking, snap it against your wrist to remind yourself of all the unpleasant reasons that made you want to quit in the first place. Then remember that you will not always need a rubber band to help you stay in line with your plans to quit. Smile at yourself then go get an apple or walk outside and breathe in the fresh air. Or start a conversation with your coworker or neighbor that has nothing to do with you.

Other Ways to Stay Active

You may have a lot of pent-up energy while trying to quit. Consider these activities when you’re looking for something to do besides smoking. Notice how over time these activities are easier to do and how much better you can breathe as you go each day without smoking.

Physical Activities

• walking or jogging
• biking
• hiking
• swimming
• doing aerobics
• going bowling
• playing soccer
• playing tennis
• playing volleyball
• playing softball
• karate or judo
• yoga

Activities Around the Home

• gardening
• cooking, grilling, or baking
• organizing/cleaning out the basement, garage, or attic
• organizing a yard sale
• painting/redecorating rooms
• washing/waxing the car

Going Out

• going fishing, hunting, or camping
• having a picnic
• going shopping
• getting a manicure or pedicure
• going for a leisurely drive
• going to a garage sale or yard sale
• going to a library or bookstore
• going to a museum
• going to the movies

Hobbies and Crafts

• playing (or learning) a musical instrument
• reading a book
• starting a collection (stamps, coins, or shells, for example)
• doing puzzles (crossword or jigsaw)
• starting a journal or scrapbook
• organizing photos
• knitting or sewing
• writing (books, poems, articles, journaling)

Relaxing

• reading a newspaper or magazine
• meditating
• listening to a relaxation tape
• taking a nap
• listening to music

Being With Others

• calling an old friend
• having someone over for dinner or to watch movies
• going out to eat
• joining a group or club
• having a family get-together

If you have a weak moment and slip, don’t panic. Decide to begin again immediately and remind yourself of your commitment to quit. Analyze why you had a setback and learn from it. Here are more tactics that have helped smokers kick the habit:

• Stay positive. After waking up each morning, make the promise you won’t smoke a cigarette that day. A day at a time keeps the whole thing more manageable. 
• Picture your success. Plan ahead and think of how you will deal with stressful situations without turning to your usual crutch of a cigarette. 
• Take a breather. Relaxation exercises can help relieve the urge to smoke. Take a deep breath, hold it for a second, then release it very slowly. Remember, the urge to smoke is only temporary. It will pass. 
• Work out. Physical activity, such as swimming, running, and racquet sports, helps relieve tension and the urge to smoke. Exercise will also burn off any extra pounds. 
• Rely on support. If you’re thinking about reaching for a cigarette, reach for help instead. Ask your friends and family to encourage the new nonsmoking you, reach out to a formal support group, or call a Quitline.

So, that’s it! I really thought there was some great advice here. One of the things I’ve found is that my mouth has never been so clean! I’ve been constantly brushing my teeth and it does help.

In the meantime, I keep plugging along towards my “Q” day, which should be pretty soon now. Good luck to you.